This was an E mail I received yesterday from dear friend, Pamela—-I wanted to share it with all of you so here you are!  Thanks Pam

A very elderly gentleman, (mid nineties) very well
dressed, hair well groomed, great looking suit, flower
in his lapel smelling slightly of a good after shave,
presenting a well looked-after image, walks into an
upscale cocktail lounge.
Seated at the bar is an elderly looking lady, (mid
eighties).
The gentleman walks over, sits alongside of her,
orders a drink, takes a sip, turns to her and says,
“So tell me, do I come here often?”

<><><><><><><>

An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for
a number of years. He went to the doctor and the
doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of
hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.
The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the
doctor and the doctor said,
“Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really
pleased that you can hear again.” The gentleman
replied,
“Oh, I haven’t told my family yet. I just sit around
and listen to their conversations.
I’ve changed my will three times!”

<><><><><><><>

Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were
sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the
other and says:
“Slim, I’m 83 years old now and I’m just full of aches
and pains. I know you’re about my age. How do you
feel?”
Slim says, “I feel just like a new-born baby.”
“Really!? Like a new-born baby!?”
“Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my
pants.
 

<><><><><><><>

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple’s
house, and after eating, the wives left the table and
went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking,
and one said, “Last night we went out to a new
restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend
it very highly.
The other man said, “What is the name of the
restaurant?”
The first man thought and thought and finally said,
“What is the name of that flower you give to someone
you love? You know… the one that’s red and has
thorns.”
“Do you mean a rose?”
“Yes, that’s the one,” replied the man.
He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled,
“Rose, what’s the name of that restaurant we went to
last night?

<><><><><><><>

Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients
being discharged.
However, while working as a student nurse, I found one
elderly gentleman—already dressed and sitting on the
bed with a suitcase at his feet who insisted he didn’t
need my help to leave the hospital.
After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly
let me wheel him to the elevator. On the way down I
asked him if his wife was meeting him. “I don’t know,
” he said.
“She’s still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of
her hospital gown.”